Every year, in January, I fire my book-keeper. She keeps showing up though, even if the pay is horrible.
And her boss can be a real doozy of a biotch when you catch her on a bad day, when’s she’s procrastinated and would rather be doing something else.
Swearing right out of the gates, eh?
Well…sorry. I guess it’s not that bad working for the woman of the house, aka, the one who gets preoccupied with her blog and all that stuff, and it is a pretty relaxed and friendly environment until deadlines show up in January.
As the book-keeper of the house, she’s got the gravy job with tons of autonomy. It’s rewarding for her, she gets to decide how the money is spent, saved, dispersed, moved, hid, spent on wine or spirits, or watched as it vanishes before her eyes into thin thick envelopes out the door on too big of expenditures she didn’t plan for, but that’s beside the point.
She deserves to be fired, she’s lazy and procrastinated.
No matter how many times she’s fired, the Mr. protests, and she’s re-hired and kept around to look pretty. ‘Cuz frankly, he doesn’t want the job either.
But, she sucks at keeping up with the filing of receipts and the subsequent tiny little who-gives-a-sh*t-anyhow allocations meticulously set up as accounts in Quicken so we would remember later how our money was spent. You know the incredibly minute stuff that isn’t tax-deductible and we never rarely look back to see how the money was spent. We just know it’s gone.
The system is there. She’s set up for success, to work diligently, all she has to do is use the tricks of the trade on a regular basis. Seems fairly straightforward to the bosses.
It always does, doesn’t it?
It’s easy to be in motion and convince yourself that you’re still making progress…Motion makes you feel like you’re getting things done. But really, you’re just preparing to get something done. When preparation becomes a form of procrastination, you need to change something. You don’t want to merely be planning. You want to be practicing…If you want to master a habit, the key is to start with repetition, not perfection… (Excerpt from Atomic Habits – James Clear)
This year, I sat with her for an afternoon (okay all weekend) and we had plenty to talk about even if she ignored me. She was one to grab her phone to check Instagram (those little creations that Mr. pumped out with his 3D printer all weekend were too cute not to share) or she stopped working to read a book or two. It was tough to keep her focused on much, that’s for sure.
She’s mastered that technique when she’s not happy about the project at hand. At least she didn’t grab chips or a beer. Yay, Day 6 of Dry January. Maybe her problem is trying to accomplish too many goals in one month?
Mostly, I asked her, “WTH? Why are you 9 months behind? We practiced, and we practiced, last January when we got caught up for 2017. Didn’t the we-don’t-want-to-go-through-that-again habit stick?”
When you’re in motion, you’re planning and strategizing and learning. Those are all good things, but they don’t produce a result. – James Clear
Her reply.
“Um, duh…No!…It’s not that fun…and by the way, I think it’s because I didn’t have a lucky cat, just a fat cat. All of the abundances of cash flew right out the door as fast as it arrived. And it depressed the hell out of me to even look at the bills, let alone relive each experience that led up to the respective receipts detailing the exact costs and even some that I had forgotten about altogether. At least I paid them mostly on time, right? Look at all of these transactions!
Now, I’m exhausted by looking at all the receipts and filing them just to make some damn woman of the house happy to feel like she’s all organized and sh*t like that in time for tax prep.”
This time of year also brings out numerous violations of the handbook, aka, the no-swearing rule, while she’s performing her overdue tasks. Trust me, those moments are a treat to witness. Seriously…
Apparently, Mr. felt sorry for us me (yeah…duh, I’m both the woman of the house and the book-keeper that I fire and rehire multiple years/days/months/weeks/moments…!). This morning I found this adorable memento sitting by my coffee cup to cheer me up and our financial reconciling efforts on.
Looks like it’s going to be a year for us to welcome in purity (aka, no less swearing) and happiness and money and good fortune after all.
According to this website (sidetracked again…), the purity of a white cat isn’t clarified but may help with the swearing and subsequent happiness factor, of course, that may come in after all the money and good fortune show up by her getting to keep her job yet another year.
Hope she finds some damn good tax deductions in those receipts…
Does anyone know if a 3-D printer is tax-deductible the year before it goes into production, or if it is classified as a therapeutic medical expense? I’ve got all year to figure that out!
Post Inspiration – Linda G. Hill’s #JusJoJan – Memento and upcoming prompts can be found along with the rules here, today’s prompt is thanks to Tara, check her website out here).
PS – Do you ever talk to yourself? Do you ever fire yourself from a role you hate doing? Do you love or hate tax prep time? Have you read Atomic Habits? I’d recommend it, it’s an interesting book.
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I am not the bookkeeper in this place, so I will throw no stones. I won’t even raise my right paw to look like I threw a stone. When the numbers are assembled and ready, I’ll file the taxes. That’s my job. I’m good…whenever.
LOL, thank you for the mulligan 😉 Much appreciated – and I hope you continue to feel better as the week goes on! Take care!
Do I talk to my self?!?…where do you think I get all my GOOD advice. LOL. And I have a family member as a CPA – I just give everything to her. Done. Love your tiny white kitty.
This is the first year, I’ve not worked on my tax chart through the year to keep track of items to hand over to the accountant when I go for my taxes … so will have to go through the electronic bank records and cut-and-past info in there … what happened to the organized me I used to be … yup blogging again has trumped organization.
I sympathize with you, dear, 100% :-)!
I usually do it as I bank electronically and just do it through the year – but to have done nothing is just unconscionable. But … we all know what a Midwest Winter means – there are days you choose to hunker down in the house. This year I won’t be shoveling, so if it is too icy or too much snow to walk, I’ll spend a Saturday doing that … before the camera tutorials (unfortunately). 🙂
Yes…the long winter! Way to Habit Stack!! I have a hunch you’ll get through your stuff faster than me…wanna race? I wanna do camera tutorials again……………………..!
We have an ugly Winter morning and I’ll pass on a walk – a thin layer of crusty snow, tons of accidents, so I’ll wait til tomorrow. I will wait on the first bad day and sit down and use my brain. I am going to subscribe to those tutorials today … hopefully I can hold onto them til I am ready and watch in a row. I’d much rather see videos, than even study the “Dummies” book as to the camera settings. (Perhaps it’s an age thing – I’m almost 8 years older than you – 63 in April.)
Our weather is nasty cold and windy this morning, but no snow. I’m not going out if I don’t have to, that’s for sure! I subscribed to them and spent a whole day watching them. I’m positive you’re gonna get through the videos in no time!
We had 50 this time yesterday – it’s a slap in the face! The little Spring teases make it difficult to return to real Winter I think. I will subscribe today … I’d rather be sitting there and do it all at once, then probably will have to try my newfound knowledge out in the house! I like taking pictures in the snow though, but not if it is coming down, as I mentioned before to you when you asked if I had issues with the lens in the cold.
Winter weather is a beast – I adore how pretty the snow is, but dread it being cold! One of the videos I watched talked about how to take care of your camera in the different temperatures. Don’t ask me which one though… I look forward to hearing what you learn!
I’ll remember what he says about the temperature and tell you. A wildlife photographer I follow told me to take the battery out of the camera and put it under my arm to warm up the battery. I had mentioned I was taking pictures of the heron and sheltered under a tree away from the snow coming down and my hand over the camera to keep it from getting wet, but it seemed to be going in slow motion. That was his solution – he lives in Vancouver, B.C. now, but grew up in Ontario, where their Winters rival ours, not quite as bad as yours.
Hmmm. I’d probably go home first!
What I remember was something about a plastic bag around the camera and gradual stages of warming up and cooling it down before going in/out in the cold. The insides of the camera, not just the battery get moisture in rapid changes in temperature. Sigh…I try not to go out in the cold with mine much. Out on the warmth of the beach on the other hand……….
The beach – sigh. I didn’t know that about damage to the camera – I always carry the small one with me and I’ve taken the big camera out maybe three times in cold weather already. I should be using my first compact digital. It worked fine, but I had “zoom envy” when I went out with my neighbor and we took the same pictures, only hers were so much better. She was driving through Elizabeth Park and handed me her camera to take some pics for her. Then she sent them to me. I only have 4X on that first camera. I look at the pics used early on in my blog and what a difference. I got the camera and wrote a post about “zoom envy”. I signed up and I also have dowloaded the “shooting in low light PDF booklet he had” … I am on Twitter but thinking of following him on Facebook, though not sure if I should wait til I read his offerings first.
LOL – I wish I could remember where I heard it about the weather and cameras, sorry! I have that zoom envy when I see the really big zoom lenses, but then I think…”Holy crap…could I even hold that steady, it looks heavy!?” So fun you know someone that you can give it a try with. I follow him on Facebook and haven’t really watched anything, but then again, I don’t spend a ton of time there. I look forward to hearing what you decide to do and what you learn!
I don’t spend a lot of time on Facebook either Shelley … a few friends don’t e-mail anymore, so I have actually turned off everyone’s posts and I just pop on there every few days and read their Facebook walls (mostly all pictures of food and politics) … I follow Facebook for the news and information about nature events/parks around me … and oh yes … the crime site so I know where the loose pit bulls, porch pirates and wily coyotes are lurking on a daily basis. 🙂 I will likely follow him unless he gets too techy … I’ll try Twitter for now. I don’t like my Twitter feed to full either … I’ll search the topics I like.
Sounds like you’ve organized that social media app well! Yikes…crimes, pit bulls, pirates, coyotes………………… Oh MY! I’ve yet to wanna try Twitter. Maybe, someday when I win the “You’ve won a lifetime of 48 hour days” lottery, I’ll try that. Do you know where I can buy some tickets? Keep me posted on what you learn!
I joined Twitter as the community editor in my Patch group was trying to get 1,000 followers so asked us to follow her. I was not on Twitter at the time, so signed up. I like watching the “Trending” stories of the day and see what is newsworthy, some entertainment newsworthiness (like Penny Marshall died and Twitter lit up) and politically, sports, … it’s all there. I follow for the news stories as they mention stories on my all-news station and they link to the CBS affiliate story and I can read the entire story later – also I am a weather worrier so follow a few weather folks there as well.
Thanks for the insight into the benefits of Twitter :-)!
Love the creativity of your writing!! I feel your pain about organizing receipts and and bills but I admire your tenacity in getting it done. I am officially fired from book-keeping job in our home. Once I mailed the bill back to our place by switching up the address to sender, that was my moment of being let go from the job.
I organize the medical bills though because it’s so time consuming. Gives me migraines!!
Great 3-D figurines!! If I had one, I would go nuts making cute little things.
Thank you, your words of encouragement make me smile! No matter what I do, I’m always fired and re-hired. So, I’ve got that going for me. This is the first year I have medical bills to keep straight, I don’t know how you do it, let alone make sure the hospital doesn’t overcharge! Grr. Your kiddos would love the printer too. It’s fascinating to watch! Thanks for stopping by to share your thoughts – hope this week is going better for you – I love your new blog look, by the way! xx
So funny…I’m officially fired for good. I would make a mess of it. The hospital bills are another story. Why do they have so many charges and adjustments and deductible and co-insurance?!
I’m glad you like the new look of my blog. I needed a change for the new year. Thanks!
LOL – I don’t know how you do it with the hospital bills! They are a maze to get through, that’s for sure. Yes, I love the new look! Hope the new year continues to bring you happiness! xx
It is no fun!!! I need lots of coffee and cake. 🙂
This blog is so me! Well, it used to be! Every year I would HATE tax time because even though I swore I would keep up with all of the receipts and paperwork during the year…I never did.
Now that we live in Spain and my husband is self-employed here we have to prepare the business tax stuff MONTHLY! I got smart and made sure to update all my U.S. tax stuff at the same time. So, this is the first January where I haven’t wanted to fire myself!
Ah, I’m so happy to hear it isn’t just me and there is hope to overcome the habit to neglect throughout the year! I always start out well, but then life in the middle of the year gets more interesting. Thank you for sharing your thoughts, and congratulations on finding a way to overcome being fired ;-)! Cheers to you, and Happy New Year too!
Whew the new year for sure has me cleaning up and out and that includes all the files spilling out of/on top of the filing cabinet! Definitely feel you on the “how am I in this position again?!” sentiment!
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LOL – apparently it’s a common phenomenon…if you find tricks that work, let me know! I’ve tried every one, and the boredom of the task wins me over every year. 😉