Adventures · Inspiration

Top 10 blogging mistakes I made in 2018

As the days of 2018 in my blogging world turn, and the New Year is about to start, I like to obsess reflect on the question every blogger wants maybe an answer to.

Go ahead, grab a cup of java and join me – you’re gonna love learning from my mistakes leading to the unanswered question of…

Will I ever figure out how to be a big blogger?

The day, in the not so distant past, my Jetpack update took my blog hostage and I couldn’t post, I spent some time obsessing reflecting and researching other big-time bloggers.  You know the ones with more followers than me.

And a few expert bloggers that have hot tips on how to grow your blog (aka, supposedly the legit research).

IMG_0541csskrupa2

It was a blurry quest.

I wanted to know what the big mistakes are that I continue to make as a self-proclaimed learning-as-I-go-blogger.

It’s important when you obsess reflect to really make yourself feel like crap sh*t to help yourself grow, don’t cha know?

You’ve got to get up every morning with determination if you’re going to go to bed with satisfaction. – George Lorimer

I’m not sure who the hell George is, but that’s pretty clear advice.

IMG_0542csskrupa2

I guess.

Where was I?

Oh, yeah, what did I learn that day of reflection (you get it, it was an obsession, but that strikeout thing is getting old, and maybe should-be #11 on the list below?).

The top 10 mistakes I make as a blogger – according to you know, the EXPERTS:

  1. The blog’s font should be easy on the eyes of the reader so when you have run on sentences, it is easy to skim them and scroll past them.  (Well, dammit, when I first learned this tip, I tried to change my font.  I know it is too damn small, but, I can’t figure out how to change it. The tips I’ve found do show screenshots of where to look in Word Press, but with my purchased theme, all I’ve discovered is that it is buried somewhere in the code.  And if I click on the Editor it warns me that I better not touch it…it’ll burn like hell or something like that?!  So I gave up, cursed forever to have a small font blog. Sorry readers!)
  2. Trying too hard to be perfect (and don’t swear too much).
  3. Not using your own voice enough – guilty, I’m afraid of looking unsmart. AnunsmartCapture
  4. Talk about myself too much (I get it, it’s hard to love a narcissist, but isn’t that the deal for a personal blog…one should write about oneself?)
  5. Posting daily? (Well, if my intent is to grow my writing skills, and I committed to a daily writing challenge, is a daily blog post such a bad thing?)
  6. Not spending enough time on content. THE BEST content EVER.  Hmm…there’s a lot of advice on that topic!  AblogcontentCapture
  7. Getting sidetracked…trying too many different types of posts…joining too many different challenges…linking up with other blogger challenges…awards and such?  (The jury is out on this one, I see a lot of blogs grow by doing many of those things, but I do enjoy being an award free blog – it fits my time-constricted schedule better.)
  8. Blog post titles that aren’t eye-catching or have an enticing opening line.  And use the excerpt function on the posts.
  9. Figuring out when is the best time to post – (I thought it is supposed to be when it’s convenient for me – duh, it’s my blog?)  Apparently when your readers read your blog is when you should schedule it to post.  Hmm…
  10. Not stopping to think about what a reader would like to read and write about that…Yep…there it is, that is my BIGGEST mistake of all…

Or is it?

Yes, and No?

I can’t just write what I think others would like to read, because then I’d be in their heads instead of my own.  And it’s hard enough for me to regurgitate my own thoughts, let alone what thoughts I think others would like to read.

But, I’ve never taken the time to ask, until now.

I’m scared as hell to ask.

But I do wanna know?

What do my readers enjoy as they stop by to read my blog?  What makes them want to hang around or stop by again?

IMG_0207csskrupa2

What if it isn’t anything?  (Sick obsessions…!)

I wish I was brave.

Brave enough to ask for feedback.

Maybe if I frame it in a “What posts don’t you care for?” type of question?

But, Yikes! – that’s scary, too!?

That might break my confidence forever and I’ll delete the blog…and go MIA…

I don’t think you have time to waste not writing because you are afraid you won’t be good enough at it, and I don’t think you have time to waste on someone who does not respond to you with kindness and respect.  You don’t want to spend your time around people who make you hold your breath.  You can’t fill up when you’re holding your breath.  And writing is about filling up, filling up when you are empty, letting images and ideas and smells run down like water – just as writing is also about dealing with the emptiness.  The emptiness destroys enough writers without the help of some friend or spouse. – Anne Lamott, excerpt from Bird by Bird

Oh, my, I am passionate about writing what I want to write about.  And I do have fun at it. I do think that counts for something.

So, I dunno, maybe others do enjoy it after all?

For now, I’ve learned a lot about blogging in 2018.  I’m looking forward to learning more in 2019.  I hope you’ll be here to join me in the new year.  I appreciate all my readers and my dear blogging friends who share their thoughts (hint, hint…no pressure, really…but…hint, hint…go ahead, feel free to comment).

Post Inspiration – Nancy Merrill’s Photography Challenge New (Aren’t those cups I received for Christmas adorable?  And those hanging little dogs on my wine glasses…what can I say it was a beverage kind of Christmas?)  

PS – What do you think about your own blog?  (Or mine if you’re willing to share)?  Do you obsess about trying to find the ‘thing’ that all readers will love?  Or do you write what you love and hope someone else likes it?  What mistakes have you learned not to make in the blogging world?  

67 thoughts on “Top 10 blogging mistakes I made in 2018

  1. Here’s a question: why do you want to be a “big blogger?” I have about 550 followers after a decade of blogging (though for years was rather idle), so that’s pretty meh, but it’s fun and also work. I have to respond to their comments and visit most of their blogs too (the active ones I like anyway). What if I had 5,000? Gah!

    Oh wait, I lied. I have two questions. Are those your mugs in the pic? I love them! I want some like that. Please tell me where you found them! 🐱😀

    1. Good question – not sure – blogging does occupy time in my day and is fun like you said :-)! The mugs were a gift from someone who lives in Michigan and they went to a cute little cat-friendly coffee shop and bought them for us. I think it is called the Happy Cat Cafe!? Thank you for sharing your questions!!

  2. I don’t follow the rules, does anyone? But there is something I’ve learned justby being observant:

    If I post at a certain time of day during a normal, regular week (not holidays etc) there is a sudden influx of likes that doesn’t happen at other times.

    So here’s the thing: on the NA continent, when do working people read blogs? Before work (during coffee), at lunch, and again prior to dinner (decompression reading on the subway?) and once again in the evening. If you hit them with fresh posts during that time, your post will probably get read first.

    That works if you know your target audience.

    My audience isn’t all in NA, so there’s timezone issues. I have new moms and homeschooling parents reading. Some single, young, travelling readers. And, quite a few seniors and empty nesters. And parents in the trenches like me. It’s all over the map.

    So when do I post?

    I like routine but life is chaotic so sometimes I fake routine by posting on a schedule.

    But, like most, I blog when I can. And I read, like and comment when I can as well.

    1. LOL – I agree, does anyone follow the rules exactly? Nope! You are very observant and have captured great tips, I appreciate you sharing them. I’m pretty much, as a reader and a writer, all over the world too. That’s exactly how I found your enjoyable blog! Thank you for sharing your insights – I appreciate hearing your thoughts!

  3. I have been MIA on my blog. For me the circumstances in my life have led to not having any more desire to write as much. I come to the post and nothing comes or I start to write and obsess (worry) about what others would think and I quit.

    Sadly, I don’t read other people’s blogs often as by the time I get home from work I am exhausted. Perhaps that’s another reason I am not writing. These two weeks off, however, have given me the opportunity to read other people’s blogs.

    When I first started blogging, I wanted to get my poems in one spot. I also wanted to find out if they were any good. I am finding blogging is not as satisfying as it used to be. and perhaps why I have trouble writing now. I want to write what I am passionate about and what I used to write about. I guess that has been my mistake is trying to impress others. It’s hard to admit, but I guess I am a bit narcissistic.

    I couldn’t say what I think about your blog as I have not read enough of it. I started following your blog awhile back, but stopped reading blogs I follow, except for a few. The ones I read or look at have photographs, are not too long, and draw my attention like yours today. Also people I am connected with as much as you can be in the blogging world. I like it when people throw in a little humor as it lightens my day, much like you did today. Losing the WordPress word prompt sent so many bloggers into different prompts and now I don’t know where those people post if I did not follow them.

    I should have probably used this as my post, but that is scary. After all what would other people think, so I put it in a comment. It’s safer this way and perhaps that is my #1 mistake. Okay maybe not #1. but it is a mistake.

    1. Thank you for sharing your thoughts – I believe you’ve hit on many emotions all bloggers feel. I appreciate your critique of what you’ve read here on my blog, thank you! And, all comments (except for spam that my Jetpack confiscates) are welcome here on my blog – hopefully, your mini-post here kick starts you to write again, you have a gift of honesty, don’t hide it – share it! 🙂

  4. Shelley, you’re a great blogger. You’re connecting with your readers, as evidenced by the comments you get. Your blog is fun to read: it’s well written, you tell good stories, you’re funny, and I don’t have any trouble reading the font. (could it be bigger? Yes. Is it worth driving yourself nuts or hiring someone to make it bigger? Only if you think it’s worth it.) You may not have that many “followers,” according to WordPress’s algorithm, but a) who cares, and b) WordPress’s algorithm doesn’t count people who subscribe through feed readers other than WordPress (like me), those who read your blog by mail, or who just show up every day to see what you have to say. After almost 7 years and just over 2500 posts, do you know how many “followers” I have? Under 400. And half of them probably don’t read it. They probably shut off notifications years ago and forgot about me.

    The most important rule of blogging is “to thine own self be true.” And you do that.

    George Lorimer is either a) an English league rugby player, b) an American journalist, c) a professor of chemistry at the University of Maryland (go Terps), or d) an American pastor. All save the professor were dead by 1937. Take your pick.

    1. Aw, shucks, John, your words of encouragement warm my heart (that’s tugging a bit today thinking about you and Mary and Bucky). I’ve always admired that you stick to your most important rule. Your blog is full of enjoyable information, is absolutely well-written, and well researched, and you have fun, that’s the key to why I read it! Thank you for sharing who George is (or could be) – like you said, that quote fits anyone of those versions of George. May the blog writing force (george) be with you as you continue blogging in 2019! Thank you for sharing your words of wisdom! Hugs to you and Mary xx

  5. I really enjoy checking in with your blog everyday because of your conversational, open style that lets me right in–like we’re neighbors. I like hearing about your pets and your daily life, the ups and downs, the frustrating, scary, and the good stuff. I think you’re right that a personal blog should be personal. Yours feels like a successful blog to me–don’t know what your numbers are like, but if it’s still fun for you, I think you’re on the right path!

    1. Thank you, Rebecca, I appreciate your kind words of encouragement. I feel the same way about you when you stop by – it’s like we’re neighbors. I like that about your blog as well. I’m inspired by your writing skills. Someday I hope to be able to write so playfully like you and how you intertwine words and thoughts and life in the Rust Belt. Happy writing in 2019! Thank you for stopping by, you’re always welcome here, and thank you for making me feel welcome on your blog too!

  6. I’ve noted bloggers with thousands of followers who get between 100 and 200 likes. Paula above is correct…500 is ok…but keeping up with 5,000 = meh…full time job & a chore!
    I think blogging is just a portion of our lives. If it’s enjoyable and feeds our creative interests that’s more important than the stats! To grow our writing, moves it from a hobby to a career and I think it must interact across other platforms, fb, community magazines, guest speaking etc.

    1. Great feedback, Marie! Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I agree with you the bigger it gets the time commitment becomes huge. Yes – the joy and creative interests are very important. And, like your blog, you provide helpful information on a topic that interests you – that means a lot too.

  7. Blogging can be a whole new world for us writers. Going round and round about how to grow our readership…er…followers. I figure the best way to look at it may be to…just write for ourselves and hope others come along for the ride. What’s the worst that can happen if someone doesn’t like something? (well, except if it’s family LOL). And it is more fun to share. I really like your blog – your photos and the stories you tell. And I agree – writing about yourself is kind of the point with most personal blogs (?) – not sure why that would be a “mistake” – except for readers who are looking for factual-only type blogs. There are enough blogs out there for everyone! Happy New Year!

    1. Thank you, for sharing your thoughts – your blog and your take on blogging model how to do just that – I can tell when I read your posts you’re enjoying yourself and being true to yourself in the process. That means a lot to me as a reader of other blogs. Yes, there are enough blogs out there for everyone, that’s for sure! Happy New Year to you, too!!

  8. What I like about your blog posts is that they are so spontaneous and from the heart! And I guess that’s how it should be. I try not to think too much about When to post as there are so many time zones. What’s important is whether your readers enjoy what you write! I do😊

    1. Aw, thank you, I appreciate your feedback about what you enjoy when you stop here to read my blog. Happy 1 year blogging anniversary to you! I love it when you share your flower paintings, they are so heart-warming happy to me!! 🙂

  9. OK Shelley.
    You made me look to see how many followers I have, 540!!! Of those 58 have commented on posts. My average of 11 comments per post, 23 likes per post. So why have I got 540 people people, many who don’t look at any of the posts. There is a core of wonderful people, around 30 who look and like and occasionally comment, they are my “family”. I have never thought of these things before.
    If you look at my photos or read the occasional poem, that’s nice. My biggest number of views was when a well known person retweeted my post of photos of fungi. My posts used to have a few hundred views a month, but since doing photo challenges the number has increased. This month the number of views is 3,500.
    Now I have lost the original idea of why I was going to comment on your post Shelley. It was probably that don’t care what the experts say, just do your thing. I would like to change my font sometimes too. Apparently the best time for me to post is Tuesdays at 2am. To hell with that I post when I want to and sometimes I don’t get feedback until the next morning which is the day I posted for the rest of the world.
    I still don’t know but hope you made sense of my waffle 🙂

    1. Thank you for sharing your thoughts, Brian! I’m so impressed you know that much about your blog stats. I like how you describe the core group as ‘family’ that’s such a nice way to describe them. Way to be famous for a day, and with fungi, no less. Impressive! Your blog is fun and interactive and that’s what I enjoy about stopping there to take a peek into your section of the world in Australia!

      1. WordPress has a Stats section for all blogs I thought. I just had to look to get the info. Glad you like stopping by at my place Shelley 🙂

  10. You have to ask yourself Shelley: what are you trying to accomplish? what do you consider a successful blog to be? I’ve been a blogger since 2007 and I have had many, many blogs, all of which I considered successful. But what are you looking for? Notoriety? I had that with my first blog since many, many newscasters throughout America wanted to interview me. My husband was furious. he wanted no one to know who the heck we were let alone come to our home and interview us. Eventually, I started getting death threats on that first blog (politics) so I had to get rid of it. It was 2007-2008.
    I’ve also had blogs that paid me, but when money is involved you forget your original intention and you start writing in such a way that draws attention so you can make said money. Not a good place for a writer to be. Then Google dumped their paying writers 9that would be me) screwed a lot of people out of money earned (that would be me) and found themselves in a cross action lawsuit (that would be me…..I’m still waiting on my money. Only been over a year and counting)
    Here’s my two cents based on my experience: would you rather have 10 followers who adore you and genuinely care about you or 1000 followers who wouldn’t give you a drop of water if they saw you thirsty on the street? I prefer the former. My current blog doesn’t have the thousands I once had, but I’ve got a bunch of readers whom I adore and who are very kind to me. After 11 years of insults and trolls, I prefer the former for sure!
    If you want to know what your readers are interested in, look at your stats. WordPress has you stats. It will show you what articles had the most traffic, the most readers and that is what your audience wants. My readers like the posts I blog about that are personal stories of my own experiences AND have to do with realistic money management in retirement. NO ONE WRITES ABOUT REALISTIC RETIREMENTS IN MY BOOK. Most brag about their exotic vacations, endless golf games, magnificent homes yada, yada, yada B.O.R.I.N.G.
    You get a lot of likes and comments from your posts, from what I can tell and that’s all good! Look at your stats and you’ll figure out your audience and you will cater to them and all will be good.
    Good luck.
    Just please don’t forget me when you become famous…..OK?

    1. Cindi – I so appreciate your wealth of knowledge on life, money, retirement, and blogging! I’m touched by hearing your experiences and the reasons why you believe what you do and that you’re not afraid of calling things out – I hope Google finally pays you. Thank you for your support, encouragement and for being one of my long-standing blogging friends! When I’m rich and famous (LOL Just kidding) you will not be forgotten – how could I forget you? No way!

  11. I am always interested in what you have to share, Shelley. It is fun to learn about different parts of the country (world) and you have a great way of describing the ordinary to make it seem less so. Thanks for all the great tips too!

    1. Aw, thank you, Janet, I appreciate your support and comments. You’re so good at it, I wish I had more time to be so supportive like you are! I love your blog too, and I’m always smiling when I find the time to stop by to see what you’re up to! Do you have any good challenge ideas to share for 2019??

      1. The big one is the A to Z in April. Last year I did one called Just Jot January. I have been doing Song Lyric Sunday and Stream of Consciousness Saturdays for a while now and I think I’m going to continue with those.

  12. Hi Shelley – I have 339 followers and all but 16 of them are WordPress folks. The rest follow by e-mail but only one of those comments regularly. I don’t know if I could follow any more people than I follow now as I do take the time to read their blogs – admittedly they don’t all post at once and many of those people that follow me, in the beginning just followed for a follow-back. I used to follow back religiously and right away, but I have learned to distinguish the people who genuinely enjoy my posts from those that simply follow to get a follow-back. I really do enjoy interacting with everyone and as I told you a couple of times, the blogging, is satisfying, but I am behind on about everything else … but then again, for me the blogging is the culmination of not only writing, but walking, and taking pictures … the pictures alone … take them/upload them … I feel sometimes like getting things done in the house (like housework, laundry) constantly get put on the back burner. But also, to answer one of your questions – I generally post at night, end of the day after getting off work, and on the weekends, it seems I am at the same time because of longer walks then and compiling the photos, etc. Out of all my followers that regularly comment and I comment on their posts, a great deal of them are on West Coast time. I find myself at night staying up til late as they have just read a post and we have a back-and-forth … I look at the clock – it is nearly midnight. I never did that before and then I wake up in the morning and another chunk of bloggers have read the posts when they get up in the morning as they are 5-6 hours’ time difference with me – so … consequently I never seem to catch up. Then 2 1/2 weeks ago I spent an entire weekend just walking, photographing at five different parks, anticipating an onslaught of crummy weather, which we still didn’t get but I know Michigan Winters. I was behind in Reader, behind in responding to comments … I felt like I was in an abyss of blogdom I’ve never been in before. Thankfully the posts slowed down a little around Christmas – many fellow bloggers “shut it down” to enjoy the holidays. I follow a woman who suspended her blog from 11/01/18 until 01/01/19 – she said she just needed time to catch up with the rest of her life … did I say she is retired?? Here are the directions I used for changing the theme font size … for me it was easy and no coding was involved … I don’t want to learn coding … the alternative is typing in a larger font size using alternate headlines … but this worked for me and you can preview the font size. I like my theme (WP 2010) but I understand it has been retired – you can still use it if it is your theme now. When I researched online, the comparable theme for me I believe was 2013, but I wanted to preserve mine. However, I need to reduce the font size and play around again as it looks way too large on the pictures … go to my blog site directly and see if it doesn’t look too big, then follow these instructions for changing your font size/type. I know when I started my blog, and up til about 2 years ago, the font size was easy to read. Then one day I went to post a blog and it was much paler. I wrote the Happiness Engineers and said “did I hit a stray key or something – my font size is smaller, paler and I don’t care for it?” They said “we did nothing.” Sorry, I know it is smaller and looked washed out amidst the colorful borders and pictures so I changed it. Here is my blog to look at “from the outside” as opposed to just a blog post in Reader and then the directions for changing the font:

    https://lindaschaubblog.net/

    https://wpsmackdown.com/change-font-size-wordpress/#font-size-theme

    1. Linda, thank you for sharing your thoughts on blogging and all the nuances involved. Like you said, it takes a lot of time. It’s up to the blogger to decide on how much effort is worth taking to do any portion of it. I keep up daily so that it doesn’t become too overwhelming. But each day brings its own unique availability time slot. Thanks for the tips on the fonts – my theme is a purchased one, not a WP one, so I believe there is a difference, so I’ll have to either live with it or contact the theme company for advice. There are bigger fish to fry (for this day’s effort ;-))! I so appreciate you, your blog and walking/writing stories, and your support here in the blogging world. Thank you – cheers to 2018 and the fun we’ll share in 2019!

      1. Hi Shelley – I enjoy the blogging very much but as I said, my followers did not occur in dribs and drabs over five years, they all were in this last year basically and I felt overwhelmed. I have to budget my time better, that seems to be the key. I also used to have a bit more time during the day at work, so I could pop on here and catch up in Reader, but that has been impossible the last year too. I didn’t realize that your theme was not WP and should have known that since you host your own blog – so much for that idea. I have to work on mine to find a better front and screen display as it seems too large to me, and I had great hope for tackling items on my “to do” list while my boss was away the last week, but because the weather was nice and I had some ideas bubbling in my head for Christmas posts, I went with that – our bad weather is coming and there will be days that I am not out on long walks and will spend some time as well as working with the DSLR and learning how to operate it manually. Also, I’ve been plagued with arm pain … me, who has never had health issues except for tonsils, I am having some problems with my arm and I believe it has something to do with how many hours I am sitting here at the table, at the computer (laptop) I saw you had a stand-up desk in one of the recent posts … I know two people with them – the receptionist where I get my allergy shots and my friend who is in year #2 of a masters program for gerontology. She is in front of a computer screen many hours a day. Both swear they have less neck pain … this started in my arm, and is also in my neck and putting on a coat, reaching behind me or above my head is a stabbing pain. So, I had a shelf in my house, and just put the shelf on top of a table to try out standing before I invest in the set-up for the laptop at the kitchen table where I spend most of my hours. My symptoms point to rotator cuff tendonitis … I have done nothing else that may have injured myself. From perusing the ergonomic posture websites, I realize I may have been sitting incorrectly all the years I’ve worked from home and it has caught up with me. Cheers to you as well Shelley!

        1. It is easy to let the blogging get overwhelming. If you find the trick to it all, LET ME KNOW! Yes, endless hours in ONE position regardless of that position (standing included) isn’t good for our bodies. We’re made to move and change positions. My neck and back pain got better when I switched to standing. While I love my standing desk, I do get fatigued by the end of the day. So I’ve resorted to part-time standing and part-time sitting on an exercise ball. That way, I’m not stuck in the standing position all day. Take care of yourself, you’re blogging friends (like me) count on hearing from you!

          1. I know a fellow blogger who uses the exercise ball – she wrote a funny post how one time she was either reading/writing a blog post, and it deflated all of a sudden and she needed help to get up. I hear the same about having a monitor that was higher (like eye level) and the keyboard being higher up – alleviating the neck and back pain. One person is short and stands on a mat (for the fatigue and to give her some height), the other girl at the allergist’s office is tall like me (5′ 9″). I had to do something and yes, it would get tiring, all day long … I may have done that back at the diner (8 hours on your feet and off your feet as long as it took you to eat your meal and many times it was on the fly). But that was 40 years ago. I do have to do more work on the ergonomics I just set up the old computer in my room with the shelving. I use it on a table for the scanner, and for my photos and the laptop is in the kitchen at the kitchen table. Not an ideal work space, but it honestly has never bothered me until late Fall and all these twinges which have morphed into sharp pains the last month. Thank you – I will/have to get a workaround or stand more to get better. I took a couple of Tylenol this morning and that’s the first time I’ve taken anything for the pain, except icing, but needed to do housework and figured I’d get it done faster/better if I wasn’t grimacing and wincing at every wrong move.

          2. Oh, my, my ball has lost air but never deflated. Yikes! I try to practice daily the art of getting up off the floor so that just in case I end up there unplanned, I can get up. I’m curious, is there a reason your boss doesn’t provide for proper workspace equipment? Mine provided the cordless keyboard and the computer equipment, but I bought the standing desk after I discovered it was horrible to sit all day long – I had hip and back pain and neck pain. Most of that has gone away now that I stand more than sit. And when there’s an extra long phone conversation I do squats – hopefully minus heavy breathing… I hope your cleaning went well and that you figure out what to do. I also noticed that once I got occupational lenses to wear while working at my computer (versus my trifocals) neck pain also subsided. I’m positive you’ll figure out what to do to optimize your workspace!

          3. Hi Shelley – I have never tried the ball. As to me, I was laid off, then my mom had these bad dizzy spells and was confined to bed. At that time, I did have a proper work station downstairs … a desktop computer and hutch, but I bought a laptop and got wireless installed/configured so that I could be upstairs with my mom after she was confined to bed. I set it up at the kitchen table. The house is small, plugs at a minimum and quite honestly, at that time, I never thought to invest in a better set-up and my downstairs set-up was too heavy/large to haul upstairs and I left the set-up downstairs as “mission control” for the cable/router. That computer is Wiindows Vista, so no longer supported by Microsoft and I have not turned it on in years. I took some time off after my mom passed away – it had been a very difficult year for me, no relatives, no one to help or be of any real support and I was on unemployment. I’ve always been frugal and the car/house was paid for, so my expenses were minimal. I was hired back part-time in 2011. I was offered my job to come back on site, but only four hours/day and I was not going to traipse to the office (driving in good weather; but two buses each way in Winter) for four hours a day and I told him that. He was not happy, but I said I was able to remote in and had done so before, so I would work my four hours from home and take a cut in pay – he agreed to this. However, he still only pays me for four hours, though I often work six hours a day. To be honest, after years of commuting, and most of that three decades plus by bus, in my mind’s eye, I saw the extra two hours I put in as equivalent to what time I would be commuting and standing out in the elements, hassles with the bus, etc. The bus worked like a charm when I took it my last two years of college, and for all those years at work, but they cut routes, the connection to the Detroit bus (city bus) for that one-mile stretch to the office was dicey and inconsistent and not a nice neighborhood for walking) and Robb paid a person in the building (he gave me a travel stipend of $100.00 a month) to ride with him. He was unreliable and I resented paying him any money, let alone $100.00. So I am fine with it. Robb has bought me two computers, asked me if I wanted a different set-up, but my house is small, the kitchen is best suited for me.
            I am close to the phone and the dictation equipment is on the table as well (I rarely use it – maybe 5 times a year, if that much). So, my set-up is perfect … or so it seemed. I could convert my mom’s room or the den/TV room into an office but I didn’t feel the need. I even bought a fax machine when I first began working from home, but I used it once … we do everything by PDF – he scans in new work/revisions. I really need no more than my phone and laptop. I mentioned my arm/shoulder to Robb about two weeks ago. He asked me if I wanted him to bring my ergonomic chair with armrests from the office and I said “no” as I didn’t like the armrests when I was there (we moved and started our own business after we left a medium-sized law firm). I didn’t like the arm rests on this very nice chair- he removed them but I didn’t like the sharp edges where they were, so he put them back on. I just set up this shelf yesterday in my room where I have this old computer … I wanted to get a feeling of how I liked standing here – it is good so far, need to stabilize the shelf a little more. If it works fine, then I’ll order a more permant “riser” for the laptop … I am mixed on whether to get a standing desk for the kitchen, or just the riser. I believe the riser, would not permit me to sit down, and like you said, standing an entire day may be a little much. I don’t work all day long … I take a break and I also “wander” during the day to other sites when I get a chance or I am bored. I supposed I could sit down during that time period and “wander” to my e-mail or WordPress or Twitter less. 🙂 I truly believe the arm/shoulder issue has been exacerbated by the blogging and all the extra hours put in doing it – yikes! Even if I could just cut down on the time spent sitting, by coming here in the morning/evening, it would help. It is also not good all the sitting and I am aware of that as well. I am 62 and will be 63 next April. I think that Robb could retire the end of 2019 – he will be 72 in March, but he is a very active 72. He is pretty self-sufficient in the office, but not so much technology/computer savvy about a lot of things. I am angry it happened this time of year – I had to hire a contractor for the snow as I don’t want to damage my arm hefting the snow … but I felt it was necessary. I realize you can raise/lower the laptop riser but I wouldn’t want to be doing that constantly all day either – might make it too loose. I am going to give this a couple of weeks and see how it works, then get the riser … I didn’t want to mess around with the crowds or order from Amazon during the holidays either.

          4. Aw, thanks for sharing the background on your current set-up. Sounds like you’ve evaluated it well. And…I think you’re on to something when you consider how much time you’re spending on the computer. I’m picky about my chairs too, I had a horrible work comp injury due to poor seating and a slanted floor, but that’s a whole different story! My standing desk alternates easily between standing and sitting, and it can be mounted on any sturdy surface. It is kind of heavy to move though so you might need to solicit the snow removal chap to assist if you did get one like mine. I will keep you in my thoughts as you recover and find a balance that works best for you so you feel better. xx

          5. Thanks Shelley – I really don’t want to take anything for this … I don’t even like OTC meds. I should have seen it coming, but because I’ve never had any health issues, save getting my tonsils out twice (they didn’t remove the “root” of one tonsil in 1972 and I had to have it removed in 1987 … I was always getting a sore throat or a cold despite taking care of myself, getting enough rest – so went to an ENT and that’s what I discovered). I meant to ask you about your glasses – I wore contact lenses for years, but started wearing glasses after I began working from home. This last pair of glasses, I got a special coating on them designed for people who use computers a lot – some type of blue tint though I see no difference at all. That was another reason I was reluctant to order the riser – my friend ordered hers through Amazon, said it was quite heavy – I was trying not to yank at my arm any more than necessary right now and she said it was a little hard to move it up and down … baby steps.
            This looks funny, but it will work for now.
            I would have just used bankers boxes stacked on top of one another, but worried about the heat from the laptop on the cardboard. Thanks again for your thoughts – I will keep you advised how this turns out. I won’t be posting as much now since it is Winter, unless the Winter is mild. I usually post more than usual during the holidays and it’s been nice weather for us in December.

          6. I’m with you on not wanting to take things, even OTC’s. I’ve heard the blue tint is helpful, I don’t have that, but my daughter does. For me the progressive lenses were absolutely impossible to use, so I went with lined trifocals, and they were better, but there’s still the struggle to see the sweet spot, so the occupational lenses do the trick – just have to remember to switch to the other glasses or I can’t see a darn thing past the computer screen. Take care, I’ll miss seeing your posts about outside. Thank you for all your thoughts, I love hearing from you! xx

          7. We’re smart to do that – I even used to take Vitamin C supplements in the Winter, along with eating clementines and I’ve cut down on them, now three a week only and just 500 mg as I kept hearing they are not good for your kidneys. Yikes – everything is bad. Do you ever look at the site “Eat This, Not That!” I subscribe to their e-mail and reading it, you’d think you had better stick with a glass of water and a toothpick. https://www.eatthis.com/
            I have the progressive lenses but I told the opthalmologist that I had gone to take my driver’s test and it was the first time I had gone into the Secretary of State in 8 years. I did not do well on the eye test and she said “are you going to see your eye doctor soon?” I told her the next month (which was true). I told him I was on a computer at least 10 hours a day so he suggested the blue tint. He said it was partly because the white light was bad if I was here just before going to bed I’ve never had a problem sleeping, except for this arm issue as I’ve had to adjust the way I sleep and let my arm lay flat on the top of the covers and sleep on the opposite side – neither which I do and I wake up on my own which I never did. The screen time is damaging our eyes I’m sure – even if you look away every 20 minutes, staring at one thing is not a good idea. Let’s win the lotto … then we are only here for blogging!

          8. Yikes…everything is eventually bad for us that was once good for us! Jeez! Thanks for the link, I’ll check them out. YES – let’s win the lotto, fly to a beach somewhere and blog about the joys of life! :-)!

  13. Hi Shelley,greetings from India,
    Thank you for your wonderful post.
    I tell you. .. it is the other way.I learnt lot from you, especially the photographic part .
    so much to learn from blogging community and so much fun you can have with like minded people .
    You mentioned lot of good things based on your experience,truly helpful to fellows like me
    Yeah,the experience and pleasure we get from the community is a continuous process.
    Keep going,keep posting.
    As you said 2019 brings us better experience.
    Wishing you all a happy and great new year !

    1. Thank you, I appreciate you sharing your thoughts. I’m glad to read my ramblings are of benefit across the world to you in India! Happy blogging in 2019 – I hope our paths continue to cross. Wishing you the best, always! PS – Don’t collect too much belly button fluff…!

  14. Shelley – your blog is YOUR world. Your thoughts, photos, stories, etc. in your voice, in your (camera’s) view. You talk about many different subjects, like empty nesters, being brave enough to go grey, your pets, your daughter …. I doubt you started blogging to make a living or have thousands of followers. Blogging is an outlet – a way of communicating, even if you are the only one reading it. You do YOU.

    1. Thank you – :-)! Your encouragement is so appreciated and I’m inspired to be true to myself each time I visit your blog. You rock YOU!

      1. awwww thanks so much!! I’m pretty transparent about my life – sometimes it’s TMI, but most times I get positive feedback.

  15. OH! and just because the “experts” say you make mistakes, who the hell are THEY to tell US what to say and how to say it??!!! I don’t like people telling me what to do — screw that!

  16. Shelley, I agree with John Holton. “To thine own self be true.” You are doing that now and I encourage you to continue. You are unique in telling your readers about you and your life. There’s no need to get into anyone else’s head if you want this to be your personal blog.

    When I started blogging, my only intention was to have an outlet for my thoughts about life and to share that life with anyone willing to read. I was excited as followers grew and I started engaging with other bloggers, but I never changed who I was or what I wrote about because of an internet article. A personal blog would have turned to fiction and I’m not a fiction writer, at least at this point.

    My post that was freshly pressed by WordPress was one about mom and her dementia, a story from my life that was true and honest and raw. I believe that draws people into a personal blog more than anything else – being honest about yourself, not hiding behind a curtain or making stuff up.

    You may look at the number of followers I have and say “wow,” but I can tell you that most of those bloggers are no longer reading my material. Some have quit blogging, some were not serious about following (they just wanted me to follow them back), and some are like me – they have less time to read others’ blogs, let alone post their own writing. I used to spend far more time on my blog and writing, but life and adult responsibilities have gotten in the way. So, I write when I can, what I want, and I don’t worry about the number of likes or comments. I try to get around and read posts when I’m able, but sometimes that’s two days later. I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’ve learned to “let go” of many things as a blogger – like stressing over statistics or how many times I post in a week, or whether I read Shelley’s blog every day. 😉

    This is supposed to be fun, so my advice after all this rambling is to sit back and have fun with your blogging. Just have fun and don’t sweat the ten million internet articles on how, what, where and when to blog.

    1. Mary, your words of wisdom touch me and warm my blogging heart. Thank you! You’ve been (and still are) the kind of genuine blogger I aim to be. When I first came across your blog, I was hooked and read every time I was able to or remembered to. I, too, have those adult commitments which get in the way more than I’d like to admit to. But someone has to pay the bills, right?! I admire you, you are true to yourself, and Gibbs and Ziva too (by the way, my two cats admire that tremendously!) Thank you so much for your feedback. Hugs to you and your mom – xx, your stories about her dementia reminded me of my mom and her journey. There’s something about a journey with dementia that brings out many emotions – it’s a good thing to let them out to help ourselves and others. PS…wait…a fiction book…in the works…!?! I can’t wait to hear more! I wish you a wonderful 2019!

      1. Oh, that fiction book may be years in the making. I’ve been wanting to take some online English and writing courses, but haven’t made the commitment. I may write about mom before delving into fiction, though, since it’s personal experience I don’t have to make up. Thank you for your kind words and here’s to blogging friendship in 2019!

        1. I’m sure it will be a fantastic book, you’ve got a gift that needs minimal polishing in my mind. I love your posts about your mom :-)! Cheers to 2019!

  17. Hi Shelley. I just recently re-started my blog after a long absence. My background is in news reporting and I love to write my blog as a total creative outlet. I, too, get into my head and obsess about doing it “right.” My husband, who is an attorney and not a creative writer, encourages me to just put something down, don’t worry about the details, just write. He knows i”m happiest when I’m expressing myself with words. I try not to be impatient about gaining followers. It takes time and honestly, I’m finding I’d rather have followers who actually engage with me than those who just follow and don’t really read my blog. I love the growth of the blogging community and look forward to building myself a meaningful one.

    Your posts are really fun to read and you’ve totally found your own voice. Don’t change that, for sure. I love the photos, too. That’s something I’d like to learn more about, how to be more visually pleasing since my focus is on the words and that comes more easily to me. I’m learning from you and the other great bloggers I follow, so stay the course, my friend.

    Happy New Year to you!

    1. Hi Barbara – thank you for sharing your thoughts, I appreciate your words of encouragement! You’re on the right track by using your blog to share your creative thoughts. You’re an eloquent writer, and with your background in news reporting your blog will take off. Keep reaching out and talking with other bloggers, that helps a lot. Stay the course, too, and thank you for the follow back, I appreciate it, I welcome you as a blogging friend and a fellow empty nesting mom! Happy New Year to you and your family!

  18. OK, I am just now getting caught up on reading from the holidays. First off, I love your mugs. They are precious. And then you wine glasses have cats on them too. And you have cats. Obviously you are a cat lady. LOL. I thoroughly enjoy your posts because you speak from the heart. I am so glad you posted a picture again of the silver ball ornament with your reflection of you taking the picture. How cool was that. And as far as the top 10 – yea there are more unanswered that answered questions but I am plugging on. I did follow one of the guru bloggers when I first started but after about a month I unfollowed him as he was way to technical and wanted to explain why I was not making any money. I don’t want to make money with my blog – I just want to say HI! The internet now allows us to speak with people all over the world and that is a marvelous tool as long as it is done respectfully. So I speak from my heart and try not to offend anyone with my ideals and hope to get some blogging friends. Have a marvelous start for the new year.

    1. Anita!!! I’ve missed you!!! Thank you for sharing and catching up – I need to do that too! I remember when you first started, and you joined my writing style challenge. You’re doing all the right things to grow a heartwarming following – you interact, you connect, and you’re kind. Thank you for being one of my blogging friends, I appreciate you! xx

      1. Thank you. I have two challenges to post for the new year to help us focus on our inner selves. Not necessarily challenges to follow each week or month but challenges to help us channel our thoughts for a more gentle way.

    1. Thank you, Jaymi – I appreciate your words of encouragement. I enjoyed your post – you’re well on the way to discovering what will work for you and your blog!! Happy blogging in 2019! 🙂

  19. That quote at the end made my chest ache, it’s just so perfect.
    I’m trying to convince myself that going hunting for ways ‘to grow my audience’ isn’t worth the time. I blog because I enjoy it and my time is probably better spent working on my writing as that is what will hopefully draw people in.
    I’m with you on the award free blog. While I enjoy the blogging challenges that can be found online, I can’t stand the awards. They feel so much like chainmail. Someone answers a load of questions about themselves and then chucks any ten nominations in that they feel like. I’d much prefer to see ones where the nominations were the emphasis and you had to explain what it was about those blogs that you loved.
    Also, your font seems fine to me.

    1. Yes, Anne Lamott has a gift for getting points across. I love her writing. I spent a considerable amount of time trying to figure out how to grow my blog, even tried the awards (once) and then realized, it wasn’t for me. It is a fun way to meet other bloggers though, and I appreciate many bloggers who enjoy doing them. It’s all in what you want for yourself, like you do in your blog. Blogging is a never-ending discovery mission to me, and someday, maybe the bell will ring and I’ll do something different? I love that post of yours, by the way, very interesting!! Thank you for stopping by to share your thoughts, I appreciate hearing from you!

        1. You’re welcome! Yes, and it takes considerably more time than I ever imagined it would – whoever said time flies when you’re having fun must’ve started out as a blogger?! 🙂

Comments are closed.